When I read this book, I pictured myself as a manager in a business setting. However, many of the principles that are presented are applicable in everyday life; with your spouse, your friends, and even your children.
This is a great book to help you refresh your "RELATIONSHIP" skills and how you interact with people. The sub title "How great leaders can produce insane results without driving people crazy", really is a perfect description of how tactful and sincere the author's (Steve Chandler) people interaction skills are motivating. I love how he requires the leader/manager/motivator to take response ability for any results. He has a very relaxed attitude towards hard work, and you can tell this is the type of stress-free guy that you would want to work with, one who knows how to get results naturally, without being weird.
I love how he challenges "a few key paradoxes". And I quote,
“The mastery of a few key paradoxes is vital. They are the paradoxes that have allowed our coaching and consulting to break through the mediocrity and inspire success where there was no success before.”
The Paradoxes are;
· To get more done slow down
· To get point across stop talking
· To hit numbers faster take it less seriously and make a game of them.
· To really lead people, go ahead of them
The author has a very tranquil comical voice that makes the book very fun to listen to. 100 ways to motivate someone would be a lot to take in all at once, so I will break this book into four blog posts. Please enjoy the notes of the first 25 out of "100 Ways To Motivate Others." I have highlighted my favorites in bold.
1. Know where motivation comes from
a. "Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it." ~Dwight Eisenhower
b. You can't manage anyone, you can’t really directly control people, motivation comes within themselves.
c. Get people to motivate themselves, you manage agreements
2. Teach self discipline.
a. We don't have self discipline, we use self discipline. Its like using Spanish, if you learn it you can use it. If you were in a foreign country the more you used the language the better off you would be, as it is with self discipline. It's not a character trait, or something you were born with. It’s a tool like a hammer, or a dictionary; good managers know that their people already have it. They don't allow the excuses because there is no such thing. It's never too late to learn the truth and implement it.
3. Tune in before u turn on.
a. "Don't tell people how to do things tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results."
b. Your people have to hear you to be moved by you. The coach has to engage in deep listening.
4. Be the cause not the effect.
a. "Shallow people believe in luck, wise and strong people believe in cause and effect." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
b. A master motivator asks, what do we want to cause to happen today?
5. Stop criticizing upper management.
a. It will damage the confidence of the team. It will send 3 negative messages;
i. This organization can't be trusted
ii. Our own management is against us
iii. Your own team leader is weak and powerless in the organization
b. The word "They" can be used as a curse word
i. A true leader never uses the word "They" to refer to senior officials, they use the word "We"
6. Do the one thing.
a. "Management is doing things right, leadership is doing the right thing." ~Peter Drucker
b. You can’t motivate others if you’re not doing the right thing.
c. There is only one thing to do and that is what you are doing right now.
d. Thinking about other things, more than one at a time causes stress in you and those around you.
e. Choose from the list of things that need to be done, and choose that one thing, slow down relax and concentrate on that one thing.
7. Keep giving feedback.
a. "The failure to give timely and most extreme cruelty that we can inflict on any human being." ~ Charles Coonrod
b. Humans crave feedback.
i. The cruelest form of punishment in prison is solitary confinement.
c. The managers that have the most difficult time are the ones that don't give constant feedback
d. Trust and communication are the two most often cited problems of an organization
8. Get input from your people
a. "I not only use all the brains I have, but all I can barrow." ~ Woodrow Wilson
b. The quality of our motivational skill is directly correlated with the quality of our questions
i. Examples
1. How can we make the buying experience with our company fundamentally different than our competition
2. How can we inspire our team to get inspired about increasing the size of each sale
3. How can we get the team more involved
4. What are your thoughts
9. Accelerate change
a. "Every organization must be prepared to abandon everything it does to survive in the future." ~ Peter Drucker
b. Understand the change cycle
i. Objection- This can't be good
ii. Reduced consciousness- this can't be good
iii. Exploration- How can I make this work for me
iv. Buy in-I've figured out how I can make this work for me and others
c. It’s human nature to resist change we all do it.
d. Understanding the change cycle will help getting employees to buy in as soon as possible
i. Prepare to communicate about this change is the most enthusiastic as positive way possible
1. It isn't the will to win that wins the game it’s the will to prepare to win
2. Don't apologize, look for the good in change
3. Recognize the competition has same problems and the strength and power in change
10. Know your owners and victims
a. “Those who follow the part of themselves that is great, will become great. Those who follow the parts that are small, will become small.” ~Mengzi
b. Owners are people who take full responsibility for their happiness. Own their response to any situation.
c. Victims are lost in their own stories, blame others, blame circumstance, and victims are hard to deal with. Victims blame the situation.
d. How to cultivate Ownership
i. Reward ownership
ii. Be an owner
iii. Take full responsibility for your staffs moral and performance
11. Lead from the front
a. “You can't change people, you must be the change you wish to see in people.” ~ Gandhi
b. It changes people more deeply and more completely than anything else you can do, so be what you want to see.
c. Three principles of leadership
i. Set an example
ii. Set an example
iii. Set an example
12. Preach the role of thought
a. "Great men are they who see that thought is stronger than any material force, that thought rules the world.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
b. See the higher purpose for your daily routine actions
c. Why does rain make one person feel happy and the other feel unhappy
d. Nothing in the world has any meaning until we give it meaning
e. “Feeling is what you get for thinking the way you do.” ~Highest IQ Ever measured Marylyn Voss Savant
f. People feel motivated only when they think motivated thoughts
13. Tell the truth quickly
a. “How many legs does a dog have if you cal his tail a leg? 4... calling the tail a leg does not make it a leg.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
b. To say, "There is nothing I can do", is self deception.
c. Great leaders/sales people ask If I were coaching me, what would I coach myself to do right now, if I were my customer, what would I want my salesman to do?
14. Don't confuse stressing out with caring.
a. “Stress in addition to being itself and the result of itself, is also the cause of itself.” ~ Ann Selai
b. Most managers try double negatives as a way to motivate others. First they intentionally upset themselves over the prospect of not reaching their goals, and then they use the upset as negative energy to fire up the team.
c. Stressing out over our teams goals is not the same as caring about them. Stressing out is not a useful form of motivation.
d. Caring is relaxing and focusing, calling on all of your resources, using that lazy dynamite.
e. “Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, it's a forgetting of the breath, its and ignorant state, it believes that everything is an emergency, nothing is that important, just lie down.” Natalie Golberg
f. In a relaxed and happy way be relentless
g. If you’re watching your favorite team, do you want a stressed out person taking the foul shot or kicking the field goal?
15. Manage your own superiors
a. “There is no such thing as constructive criticism”~ Dale Carnegie
b. Frequent change in leadership, mixed messages, take it as a challenge, trust the process
i. Can you teach yourself to live with the change
16. Put your hose away
a. “Wise leaders high achievers come to understand that they can't hope to eliminate problems, and they wouldn't want to.” ~ Dale Daughton
b. When you become firefighter, you don't direct your team, the fire decides for you, you become unconscious to opportunity.
c. If you are an unmotivational manager even after you put the fire out you will search for another, because that what you know.
d. A great motivator doesn't fight fires 24/7, a true motivator leads people from current into the future.
e. The only time a fire should be put is when it’s in the way, sometimes the fire doesn't even need to be put out.
17. Get the picture
a. “People can not be managed, inventory can be managed, but people must be lead.” H Ross Perot
b. Leadership is a skill, it can be taught, like gardening or chess like a computer game, if the desire to lead is present.
c. Companies could develop their managers into leaders but they don't cultivate it and they can't define it, they don't hold meetings in where leadership is discussed
i. Always have a picture of what a true leader is. People are not motivated by people who can 't picture leadership
d. "Think like a hero, who can I help today, work like an artist, what else can we try, refuse to be ordinary, pursue excellence and then kill it, and celebrate but take no credit." ~Author
18. Manage agreements not people.
a. Those that are most slow in making the promises are the most faithful in the performance of them. ~ John Jack Luso
b. You can't manage people. Managers make a mistake when they try to manage people.
- It encourages employees to take an immature approach to interaction
- A leader is always serving
19. Focus on the result not the excuse
a. A Leader has to be able to change an organization that is dreamless soulless and visionless, someone's got to make a wake up call. ~Warren Bennis
b. Cultivate the why, what's one thing more that it will do for you, what are the activities that you would do?
c. If a person(employee) really wanted something they would get it. (No excuses)
d. Manage results
20. Coach the outcome
a. Unless commitments are made, there are only promises and hopes, but no plans. ~Peter Drucker
b. The time you spend with your producers, helps your team more, than the time you spend with your non-producers.
i. Teach a top producer how to sell 15 instead of 10, rather than a non producer sell 7 instead of 4.
c. Managers need to simplify simplify simplify, not complicate, multi task, and complicate,
i. Keep it as simple as possible with your non performers
d. Non performers will always want to sell you on what they have done, not the outcome.
e. Hold the non producers accountable for the results they are getting and not how hard they are trying. The minute a manager falls for how hard they are trying, they have broken the cause and effect link. They will try and draw you into technique/actions
f. If you focus on activities that’s what you will get, if you focus on results that is what you will get.
21. Create a game
a. Although some people think life is a battle, it is actual a game of giving and receiving. ~Florence Skullvile Shims
b. To be the most effective motivational leader as you can be, you might want to show your people that life with you is a game, and the game itself is being played for the sheer fun of it.
c. Leaders create, managers react.
d. Use the "Motivation of Recreation”
i. Feedback
ii. Score keeping
iii. Goal setting
iv. Consistent coaching
v. Personal trust
22. Know your purpose
a. There is nothing to useless as doing efficiently, what should not be done at all. ~Peter Drucker
b. Multi tasking is the greatest myth in modern day business.
i. The thinking part of the brain does not multi task, and so people do not really multi task. The human system is not set up that way, the system has one thought at a time.
ii. Managers move from doing one thing badly to the next
23. See what’s possible
a. “Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self esteem of their personal. If people believe in themselves it’s amazing what they can accomplish.” Sam Walton
b. Learn from the great leaders that have motivated you. Channel them clone them and incorporate them into who you are all day.
24. Enjoy the “A-R-T” of confrontation
a. “To command is to serve nothing more nothing less.” -Andre Mal Rowe
b. Learn how to enjoy holding people accountable
i. A-ppreciate and acknowledge the employee for who she is what se brings to the organization, then give a very specific recent example of something that employee did that impressed you.
ii. R-estate your own commitment to that person. I believe in you I hired you because of what I saw in you, I see more in you now than I did when I hired you. I'm devoted to you career, I'm always available. Then list what you do, express how you fight for fair pay, available all time, get the employee the tools the employee needs.
iii. T-rack the agreement. If there no agreement, you should create one on the spot, with mutual agreement and mutual respect. Agreements are co-creations they are not mandates or rules. When agreements are being kept, both sides need to put their cards on the table, in a mutually supportive way, to either rebuild the agreement or create a new agreement.
1. People will break other people’s rules, but people will keep their own agreements.
25. Feed your healthy ego
a. “Learning to be a leader is the same process as learning to be an integrated and healthy person.” -Warren Bennis
b. High self esteem is our birthright, we need to droop the thinking that contaminates it.
c. We as human being find it easier to follow someone with high self confidence.
d. "A person who feels undeserving of achievement and success is unlikely to ignite high aspirations in others, nor can leaders draw forth the best in others if their primary need arising from their insecurities is to prove themselves right and others wrong. In which case the relationship to others is not inspirational but adversarial. It is a fallacy to say that a great leader should be ego-less. A leader needs an ego sufficiently healthy that it does not perceive itself as on trial in every encounter , is not operating out of anxiety and defensiveness, so that the leader is free to be task and results oriented, not oriented towards self aggrandizement or self protection. A healthy ego asks, what needs to be done? An unhealthy ego asks, how can I avoid looking bad?” Nathaniel Bran
